Krsna has two hands, one with which He beckons us with His enchanting beauty, and one with which He cuts our attachments. Misery from sickness, loss, insults and other miseries are caused not by what happens, but our attachments to body, "possessions" and other things. We are exactly like a child who is clinging on to a scorpion. The parent tells him to put it down, but he will not, so the attentive loving parent then pries open his fingers, forcing him to drop it, which unleashes his anger at the parent. Like the child, we then throw a tantrum, “How could you do this to me? I am your devotee!” At such times, Krsna, with a gentle smile retreats, unoffended, just like a mother who when pregnant, is never offended by the kicks of the child within, but it is delighted seeing the shape of its feet, contacting her. He is so keen for a loving relationship with us, and we so forgetful, that any way we remember Him brings Him pleasure. But when we surrender to Him in love, He becomes forever indebted to us, selling Himself, and becoming our possession. Who in this world can compare to His causeless love, which is without limits or conditions, and which is thrown at us, enveloping our very being?
Since Krsna is so much in love with even His neophyte devotees, for that reason, only vaisnava aparadha to His devotees can stop His loving attentive glances from reaching us. For this reason I told a gay devotee who seems to be always getting insulted by so-called devotees online. “Don't even read their comments. Avoid them.” This is advice from our acaryas- because reading or associating with them is a lose-lose situation. We get hurt, which brings pain to our eternal friend within, and the perpetrators who get momentary pleasure from hurting us, are cast far away from Krsna- all a terrible and undesirable outcome, as we should wish good for all.
For this reason also, it is better not to defend a cause in which we are personally involved. My friend, though being embodied in a gay body, jumped into a homophobic discussion, guaranteeing an inauspicious outcome. Similarly, I see women jumping into misogynistic discussions. I avoid them. If, in the course of debating on other issues, a misogynistic comment or two is thrown at me “What can you expect from a woman?” I completely ignore them, sum up my points, and leave the discussion.
But if we are unavoidably insulted and hurt, or if we experience unavoidable loss or sickness, then it is just Krsna prying open our fingers. Our attachments to that which is not Krsna, are causing us unavoidable momentary pain. At such times we have to remember that ecstasy and agony are closely intertwined in loving play, and Krsna's embrace is sometimes very tight. That we perceive it as painful, or undesirable, simply means that He wants us more than we want Him. As soon as we increase our desire for Him, the perception of such events being painful subsides, and we feels pleasure from both hands embracing us.